Does it sometimes seem as if the powers at work are SO busy talk-talking about and creating “action plans” about needed changes that your opinion falls on deaf ears and doesn’t seem to carry more weight? If it is true that meaningful change must harness the individual powers of all employees, working as a team, then who has the power to make change happen fast and last? Why doesn’t your opinion count for more? Are you just supposed to surf the ‘Net and get some sleep at work until you can go home and start living authentically? Alas, if the No. 1 indicator of success in the business world today is the ability to harness the power of change…and make small changes that all team members must “buy into” for huge profits, why are companies and leaders ignoring the very workers who have the power to pull off these changes…namely, YOU?!
WHAT CAN I/WE DO TO MAKE THINGS BETTER FOR YOU?
When I do workshops on Leadership Talks and on the Talk To Me communication training system for a wide variety of corporations, companies, small businesses, associations and the like…I am amazed at the level of disempowerment and even open disgruntlement that workers today express. A common complaint: “Why don’t THEY ask ME what would help to make things better around here? What will it take for my ideas to jump over hurdles and be listened to or used? Why do we talk a good game of change, but then not change what would really solve the problems? What are we so afraid of…the unknown? I’m tired of the talk…talk…talk that the “talking heads” around here do while feathering their nests. It’s as deep as a can of nuts!
ARE YOU SATISFYING YOUR CUSTOMERS AND COWORKERS?
I recommend you ask these powerful questions to all of your customers whether upper management does or doesn’t:
1. What can I/we do to make things better for you?
2. What grade would you give me/us about how well I/we’re serving your interests and needs?
3. What ONE thing can I do to make your life better…and your job
easier?4. What have I promised to do for you, that I have failed to come
through on?5. What could I/we do to open up lines of communication with you?
THE POWER RESIDES IN YOU?
When it comes to you, your life and your self-esteem, please know this is true as the nose on your face:
- The power isn’t in your boss
- The power isn’t in your company
- The power isn’t in shopping at the mall (Just teasing here, teens)
- The power isn’t in your luncheon sandwich, salad or soup (Just teasing you here, hungry adults)
- The power isn’t in your bank account, new purse or car
- The power isn’t in your fantasies, reverie or imagination (But it makes me feel so good, too)
- The power isn’t in your romantic partner’s mood or how nice they are treating you
- The power isn’t in the newest, latest and greatest business action plan that the brains have devised
- The power isn’t in the latest business guru who teasingly asks you: “Who moved my cheese?”
- The power isn’t in your brilliant ideas, untapped and unused talents, your unrealized potential for greatness
- The power isn’t in your procrastinating to gain a sense of control during tough times
- The power isn’t in not caring about what happens so you don’t get hurt
- The power isn’t in complaining, laughing painfully and belly-aching over the top of cubicles
- The power isn’t in the big boys and the big girls leaders club who sound SO super-confident
- The power isn’t in your next door office mate or neighbor
- The power isn’t in your mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, president, vice-president, or janitor (well maybe the custodian)
- The power isn’t in the difficult person, the negatalker, your antagonistic intimidator, team partner nemesis or other BIG TALKER with a small mind
- The power isn’t solely in the latest and greatest work crisis, psychodrama or stress event
- The power isn’t swashbuckling pep-talk that is fakery and phony-baloney
- The power isn’t in a powerful mentor, beloved friend or super-smart colleague you admire
- The power isn’t in my book TALK TO ME or on this Web page (well…maybe…still no, though…I’m just seriously joking, here…I think!)
- THE POWER IS IN YOU to walk carefully off the slippery slope called poor-me, victim thinking!
ARE YOU MADE TO FEEL LUCKY/GUILTY THAT THE COMPANY EVEN BOTHERS TO DO BUSINESS WITH YOU?
You are self-employed, and selling your talents to a grateful or begrudging customer or company group. Do you feel like an unwanted guest at the corporate or company change party, sometimes? Who doesn’t! One thing is for sure…if the power to change our companies resides in the individuals who work for THE company, why NOT make all
the people feel genuinely important instead of overlooked, invisible and insignificant? Why aren’t we remembering that THE POWER TO CHANGE IS WITHIN EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US…YOU AND ME.
In short, talk is cheap but positive action in the workplace is priceless!
THE POWER IS IN YOUR DOING SOMETHING NEW FOR A CHANGE
Yea…I say unto thee…The power isn’t in a movie star, a talking head, a bestseller, fashionable styles, the perfect body weight, finally achieving perfection, beauty and good looks, cosmetic surgery, applause and positive strokes, being needed, getting the kids raised and off to college, a pretty PowerPoint presentation, winning the debate point at the expense of a good relationship, communicating that means agreeing with mediocrity, nodding your head when you would rather say “no,” clamming up when a bully pushes a point down your throat, telling the boss what s/he wants to hear, being depressed and depressive to be around…or other emotional gadgetry that nets you misery and pours water on the fires of your passion that interferes with making a good work performance into a GREAT job well done! Can I hear an “Ah-ha…the light bulb has turned on!”
THE POWER IS IN YOU TO WALK CAREFULLY OFF THE SLIPPERY SLOPE OF POOR ME, VICTIM THINKING
No matter how despondent you feel…no matter how many times you feel you’ve beaten your head up against the corporate brick wall…no matter how many times your boss seems to pursue their own agenda at the expense of your wisdom…no matter how often you feel like shutting down or shutting off…no matter own many times you stuff anger only to stuff yourself with food or booze later…don’t you give up hope! Don’t you do IT. Don’t you allow your positive actions based on a positive attitude to get lost in the desert called the fear of change. The power IS in YOU! As Dr. Wayne Dyer, says: Believe IT, and YOU WILL SEE IT.
Yes, you and I DO really upset ourselves AND there’s everything in the inner-personal, private self-talk world that we can do about it. Walk off that slippery slope. Say, I WILL whenever I want to, Coach Dennis O’Grady!”
IT…MY WORK…REALLY UPSETS ME!?
Sure, a situation exerts control over you, your physical health and psychological welfare, your emotional mood…and many more aspects of your life. BUT you still have a say in how you will experience these stress events…in a positive or negative attitude that makes you a victim or a victor.
Does “IT really upset YOU and ME?!” Or is it truer and more genuine to say, “I really upset ME?” Well, it’s both to be sure…but you only have control over the later agency…namely, YOU. If you and I have the power to upset ourselves, then you have the accompanying power to un-upset yourself. Unleash your positive change powers as a healing force in a difficult work world, today. And don’t ever let anyone keep you down for very long!
Dr. Dennis O’Grady is a clinical psychologist and communications coach from Dayton, Ohio, USA. His new communication theory of Empathizer (E-type) vs. Instigator (I-type) communicators is featured in his newly released book TALK TO ME: Communication Moves to Get Along with Anyone. In Dr. O’Grady’s landmark clinical studies, Empathizer communicators perceive the locus of control or power to be in the other person or situation, while Instigator communicators perceive the locus of control or power to be in the self or the situation. Just click on the underlined links to view workshop descriptions based on Dr. O’Grady’s books including Change Management, Communication Skills and Conflict Resolution.