Have you ever secretly wished you could annihilate all the stupid people in the world? I have, so do tell me the truth. If you had a delete button to eliminate the disturbing people in your life, would you push it? If you could erase all the self esteem-shredding statements which people have said to you, would you? Or would you work with the disturbing emotions and leave alone the people who disturbed you?
WHY GO NUTS WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE CONTROL
Do you know anyone who lives by a “whiny manifesto?” Do you know a member of your work or family group who doesn’t think he or she has any problems or issues that need to be dealt with? Who doesn’t….
Disgruntlements that disturb us mightily, that you and I can change:
1. I CAN’T LET OTHERS BE MY WORRY. Why should I chronically let others upset and unsettle me with their poor choices?
2. I CAN’T ALWAYS FIX IT. Why do I have to fix what others unmindfully break?
3. I CAN’T MAKE YOU MOVE ON AND CHANGE. Why do I feel others won’t change what’s annoying me and blocking good communication?
4. I CAN’T AFFORD A LACK OF CONFIDENCE. Why do I allow myself to think others have power over me so they can tear down my self-confidence?
5. I CAN’T MAKE PEOPLE FEEL GOOD. Why is it that I think I have the power to make others feel good when they don’t try to help themselves?
6. I CAN’T FIX YOU. Why do you think I can fix your problems? Remember that saying, “Give a child a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a child to fish, and he’ll never go hungry?” I’ve done all I can do to help you — now it’s up to you to step up to the plate and take control over your life.
7. I CAN’T MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY. Why do I feel it is my obligation to make everyone happy, when they have control over their own feelings…I don’t?
8. I CAN’T MAKE LIFE EASIER FOR YOU. Why must I knock myself out, giving and doing for you when you won’t help yourself?
9. I CAN’T MAKE YOU TAKE GOOD ADVICE. Why should I bother to give you good advice when you ignore it or wait for me to do for you what needs to be done?
10. I CAN’T MAKE YOU ACT POSITIVELY IN OUR RELATIONSHIP. Why can’t you make choices that positively impact our relationship without my pitching a hissy fit?
11. I CAN’T SPEED UP YOUR DECISIONS. Why must you take forever and a day to make decisions that aren’t life-threatening or life-changing? I realize that all options must be explored and the possible outcomes weighed, but…get real!
12. I CAN’T DENY KIDS ARE AMAZING PEOPLE. Why can’t you accept the fact that sometimes kids have more insight into a problem or have a solution to a problem, than even the most intelligent adult?
13. I CAN’T GET AFTER YOU LIKE A MOTHER. Why do you expect me to be your parent? You may have different perspectives on some issues, but you have the brainpower and resources to take care of yourself.
14. I CAN’T MAKE YOU BE A RESPONSIBLE, CARING, LOVING, GOOD MAN OR WOMAN. Why must anyone feel that s/he isn’t capable of being caring, loving, and good, on his or her own? Ever heard the command, “GROW UP!“? If you want others to be caring, loving, and a good partner for you, then you have to reciprocate…or even initiate…those same behaviors that you want and expect…and, hopefully, deserve.
Allow your emotions to set you free. After all, if you were to delete all the people in the world who bug you, there are billions more where they came from to do you the same service.
ABOUT DENNIS E. O’GRADY, PSY.D.
Dr. Dennis O’Grady is the developer of a powerful communication system which has been proven to increase positive communication, energy, mood, business performance, personal life circumstances, and to help those who use the system to enjoy the ride of their lives. Don’t believe it? That’s because you’re investing in energy-draining communication strategies that keep you stuck, spinning the tires of your communicator car until smoke is surrounding you. Would you like to take a little pressure off yourself today, improving your performance and your mood? Then learn the Talk to Me communication system that is results-driven and personally proven. Don’t know about your communicator type? Yikes…you are not licensed to drive on the talk highway! Read the “let’s all talk” textbook that will change your communication viewpoint forever, “Talk to Me: Communication Moves To Get Along With Anyone” available at this site and on Amazon.