Posts in category: EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

What one word describes the values you parlay as a positive communicator? In a recent continual communication improvement Talk2Me© positive communication class I led, the 13 participants came up with these gems to mine…

1. DIRECT: There shouldn’t be any question or confusion about what the meeting was about.

2. CONSISTENT: You have to communicate with everyone, and give the same message to all the people you are speaking to.

3. IMPARTIAL: Be even-tempered with different types of people that will make your message “nothing personal.” Adapt your style to the person.

4. EMOTIONAL: Don’t be a nagging spouse or backseat driver. Get your point across any way you can that’s positive and effective.

5. FAIRLY. Treat everybody with respect, and find out what he or she need, and meet the need. Listen to problems and deal with problems the best you can.

6. TREAT PEOPLE THE SAME WAY YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED.

7. BEING BRUTALLY HONEST. Saying what you see without mincing words or candy coat or beat around the bush or fluff up the pillow.

8. HONEST FEEDBACK: IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH DON’T ASK ME. If you don’t want the truth, don’t ask me. I tell you straightforward what the truth is and then I’ll take time to listen to them. You will know the problem and how to solve.

9. CARING DISCIPLINE/NEGATIVE. I focus on looking for the shortcomings and don’t pat enough people on the back. Crap runs downhill and falls on our shoulders to discipline. I don’t give enough pats on the back.

10. EVERYBODY LISTEN TO EVERYBODY. The key is listening and giving an honest answer as to what to do. Persuasion is a key to pull in the same direction.

11. DELEGATE AUTHORITY. Let go of needing to micromanage or control and trust your people to deliver instead of put up roadblocks.

12. TOUGH LOVE: SPOT PROBLEMS TO SOLVE. See the problems that require solving through “tough love.” It’s nothing personal, because I’ve got a job to do.

13. I’M NOT UPSET WITH THE ACTOR…I’M UPSET WITH THE ACT. Your goal is to improve performance through communication both complimentary and disciplinary. We remember the bad stuff and forget about the good stuff.

14. SHRINKS. You’re only as strong as your weakest link. 10% of workers are low achievers. The people that need education the most tell you what you and your company stand for.

15. WEAK LINKS. Each person has to understand how important contributions are to the entire organization.

16. DON’T BRING DOWN YOUR POSITIVE PEOPLE. Help up your peers who need a helping hand. Routines bring us good luck.

17. PERSONABLE. Get to know your employees a little bit but not a lot. When you sit them down to tell them what they’ve done wrong, the medicine goes down easier.

18. BE AN OPEN-MINDED COMMUNICATOR. Be open to meeting needs. It’s important to hear and understand needs and your communication lines will be open. You can get your point across but not communicate well.

19. SHOW A LITTLE CARING. Show a little caring and the barriers come down. Listening solves problems and issues. Come to achieve a common goal, and be successful.

20. YOU CAN HEAR SOMETHING YOU CAN IMPROVE ON. I will take the toothpick or tree out of my eye.

21. OUTGOING. Does that really apply to me? I’m the type of individual who likes to be involved. We see our employees more than family. There are power issues, family conflicts, and health issues. Some times you have an iron fist and sometimes you need to put the velvet glove on. You can learn something if you listen.

22. LISTEN FIRST–REACT LATER. That’s how you build relationships. We’re expected to deal with all problems, and can’t afford to build a brick wall up. Look to better the employee…better the circumstance.

23. BE DIRECT…BE DIRECT…BE DIRECT…BE DIRECT. Let people know how it is. Tell people what they’re doing wrong and give them the opportunity for improvement.

24. ADJUSTING. Not everyone responds the same but give each consistency and honesty, and spend some time training.

Do you parlay as a positive communicator? “Parlay” means “to make good use of an asset or advantage to obtain success.”

TO MAKE GOOD USE OF YOUR COMMUNICATION ASSETS

So I took a democratic group vote to answer this penetrating question: WHAT WILL YOU BE KNOWN FOR AS A GROUP OF GOOD COMMUNICATORS? Here is the tally to parlay:

1. HONEST
2. EFFECTIVE
3. BEING OPEN (TWO-WAY HIGHWAY)
4. ADJUSTING/FLEXIBLE
5. FAIR

WHAT TYPE OF COMMUNICATOR ARE YOU?

You get things done in a timely and effective manner, too, don’t you? What type of communicator are you when mood storms rage?

WHAT TYPE OF COMMUNICATOR AM I? TO BE AN EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATOR IN LIFE REQUIRES HONESTY, AND OPEN, TWO-WAY COMMUNICATION.

You said it!

WILL THE TALK TO ME© SYSTEM WORK FOR YOU?

In the words of one top executive of a major regional company which is based in Dayton, “…If we can’t communicate with each other, therein lies many of our problems. It’s all about the customer. Talk To Me© is a communication system that will give you the tools and strategies to communicate better with your peers, your subordinates, your customers, your families. You learn how to listen and how to talk more effectively. Talk To Me© is great, but you can’t really explain it….It just works! As you put the communication tools and strategies that you learn to good use, you set up the work climate for clear communication, thus setting yourself up for success.”

How do you tap into top talks? What do you have to do to kick start maximum positive results from every contributor who is seated around Your Communicator Table? First of all, you must know the ins and outs of your particular and peculiar communicator style, as either an Empathizer-type or Instigator-type communicator, which are explained in the Talk2Me Driver’s Manual for powerful communication.

TOP TALK CHARACTERISTICS TODAY

For maximum positive results around the Communicator Table, you should demote Negatalkers and promote these results-driven characteristics that sensitive people love to love:

• TALK IS CONSISTENT, CLEAR, AND CORRECT

• FEEDBACK IS CONDUCTED…GIVING AND RECEIVING ACCURATE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE POINTERS FOR GROWTH

• COMFORT LEVEL…DO YOU FEEL A TRUE CONNECTION?

• FEEL COMFORTABLE SHARING ANYTHING

• YOU FEEL VALUED AND HEARD

• EFFECTIVE…DOES THE COMMUNICATION GET THE JOB DONE

• WHAT FORM? THE COMMUNICATION PREFERENCE FOR EMAIL, VOICE MAIL, IN-PERSON, TEXTING IS UTILIZED

• OPEN TO LISTENING EVEN WHEN BUSY

THE MIRACLE OF COMMUNICATION

Think of good communication as the hub of a wagon wheel. Benefits flow down each spoke of the wheel…benefits such as improved morale, higher productivity, fewer problems, extra effort, attracting A players, tossing out bad apples from the orchard, feeling focused and energized, sharing recognition respectfully. Pretty nifty results when the rubber gets rollin’ down the road of good talk at work or home, wouldn’t you say?

ABOUT “TALK DOC” COMMUNICATIONS PSYCHOLOGIST, DENNIS E. O’GRADY

Dennis O’Grady, Psy.D., is known as the Talk Doc since the advent of his positive and effective communication system, Talk2Me©. Dennis is a corporate consultant and team trainer, while maintaining a private practice which focuses on improving communication between couples and among family members.

Do you listen when you talk? I nicknamed a recent training class of mine the “Precision Communicators.” The 9 Instigators and 1 Empathizer communicator all told me they can do two things at once pretty well, including: “Listen when you talk.” Listening to hear with three ears, while speaking with a straight (not forked) tongue, changes us all.

THESE LITTLE CHANGES IN YOUR TALK HABITS NET HUGE REWARDS

How can you take communication training back to your home turf? The following strategies are what my team of “I’ll walk a mile in your moccasins for a change!” Precision Communicators told me that the wise man and woman…

1. ALLOCATE TIME. Minutes a day and small changes net huge rewards.

2. SPEAK POSITIVELY. You get a lot more out of your people when you speak positively. Catch someone in the act of doing something well.

3. STUDY MY WORKERS. Pinpoint your workers’ types (Empathizer or Instigator) so you’re not blind-sided.

4. RESPECT EVERYONE. Know the talk type of your life partner, your kids, and your grandkids. Create a “Talk Type Family Genealogy Tree.” Also, notice your weaknesses and improve them…don’t accept “There’s nothing I could do,” or “It hit me out of the blue.”

5. TALK TO MY OPPOSITES. Be more genuine with those people with whom you don’t get along. Speak up and disagree when you should, and don’t withdraw behind a resentment wall or look the other way.

6. LISTEN BETTER. Listen to what you’re saying, for a change, so you don’t put your foot in your mouth. That’s the way to get to the problem. Don’t listen for the quick fix or for what you want to direct and react to. Use “I need to see you a few minutes,” to spread the praise around.

7. LISTEN WHEN YOU TALK. It’s so easy to pull someone in when you talk, by listening without an agenda. Don’t shut your fellow communicator down by getting things off your chest while downing your fellow talk traveler, who will then pollute everything.

8. DON’T EXPECT EVERYONE TO BE LIKE YOU. Realize everybody’s different…except that we all need praise – praise when you don’t want or need something. Ease into the praise so you don’t sound patronizing.

9. SET THE TIME TO TALK. Put on your to-do list to talk with someone whom you ordinarily don’t take a minute to converse. Set time aside when you have none, to make deposits in your Communication Savings Account.

10. MAKE YOURSELF AVAILABLE AND ACCESSIBLE. It’s easy to barricade yourself in your office and go at it with paperwork. Get out of your comfort zone! In order to have unexpected communication opportunities, you need to be where the people are!

DO YOU LISTEN WHILE YOU TALK?

“Whistle While You Work” was an inspiring song in Disney’s The Seven Dwarfs. I define listen while you talk as: Listening to the non-verbal cues your co-communicator is sending out to you to forge a deeper connection. Does a positive question or positive statement come to mind that you can share? Example: “Thanks for all your extra efforts around here.” Pinpoint to whom you’re talking by communicator type, Empathizer or Instigator. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Then you’re not licensed to drive on the two-way Communicator Highway.

ABOUT “TALK DOC” DENNIS O’GRADY, PSY.D.

Dr. O’Grady’s Talk2Me communication system gives people tools which enable them to successfully travel on the two-way communication highway and to reap the rewards of their investments in their people and company. Dennis can be reached at 937-428-0724.

When you walk through the doors of any company, you get a sense of the communication of attitude. It’s in the air you breathe. According to this communications psychologist, what communication dynamics create a great company? People talk tools.

THE TALK TO ME© SYSTEM SAYS HE WHO HAS THE COMMUNICATION TOOLS TO GET ALONG WITH ANYONE WRITES THE RULES

Here’s what I’ve learned from inspiring leaders of successful companies, regarding talk rules to live by and profit from…

• Provide personal growth opportunities for employees
• Start every meeting by talking about values
  
• Live by a positive attitude
  
• Strive to get along with others – at all levels
• Key in on communication dynamics, such as providing a regular diet of praise
  
• Show respect for everyone
  
• Have the courage to take risks
  
• Give the freedom to be oneself in all contexts
  
• Invest in the financial security of a complete benefits package for employees
  
• Produce replicable results
  
• Don’t take on the negative energy of Negatalkers
  
• Manage your stormy moods and frustrations

COMMUNICATION TOOLS TO GET ALONG WITH ANYONE

I boil success down to the ability to get along with anyone when you feel you’ve got a flat tire. This “rubber meets the road” ability to get along with all people, survives even when you’re in a bad mood. Walking the talk: Can you get along with almost everyone, even those difficult people who grate on your last, frayed nerve?

ABOUT “TALK DOC” DENNIS O’GRADY, PSY.D.

Dr. O’Grady’s Talk2Me communication system gives people tools which enable them to successfully travel on the two-way communication highway and to reap the rewards of their investments in their people and company. Dennis can be reached at 937-428-0724.

When starting at the top and using the in Talk To Me© positive and effective communication system, good communication gathers momentum and bulk as it spreads throughout families and organizations, much like lava flowing downhill. But you already knew that….

WE ALL MUST WALK THE TALK

What talk do you and your tuned-in co-communicators say we all must walk in order for it to qualify as good communication?

• Keep it upbeat and positive
• Be clear
• Don’t leave until both parties understand
• Be sure to look at the big picture
• Make time for short meetings
• Be direct
• Stay focused
• Be sincere and honest
• Be on equal ground, feeling at ease
• Confidence: Believe in yourself and to whom you are speaking
• Use emotional self-control

THE MIRACLE OF COMMUNICATION

Think of good communication as the hub of a wagon wheel.  Each small spoke represents these positive and effective communication strategies: Being a positive person, clear and assertive talk, energized and motivated, surfing the stress wave, relaxed and feeling at ease. Big benefits also flow down each spoke of the wheel, benefits such as improved morale, smaller mistakes, higher productivity, fewer problems, building a high-performing team, individual extra effort, attracting A-list players, tossing out bad apples from the bushel basket, feeling focused and energized, even during down times. Pretty nifty results when the rubber gets rollin’ down the road on the two-way communicator highway.

ABOUT TALK DOC, DENNIS E. O’GRADY

Dennis O’Grady, Psy.D., is known as the Talk Doc since the advent of his positive and effective communication system, Talk to Me©. His talk textbook, Talk to Me: Communication Moves to Get Along With Anyone, received the 2008 Axiom Business Book Award Silver Medal.